WNBA free agency is fully underway. As of February 1, eligible players may sign with new teams, and their best friends are coming with them. Here is a rundown of the teams that have gone to the dogs in 2022, graded based on my personal excitement level. (Because it's my site, and not yours).
Grade: A
While it was inevitable that Chicago could not keep the full pack together after their 2021 championship run, the Sky successfully staved off Russian interference and brought back their two key pieces: Sonny (Kahleah Copper's son) and at least half of dynamic duo Romeo and Gem (pups of power couple Courtney Vandersloot and Allie Quigley). Unfortunately, they had to lose a couple of dogs in the process, but the Sky brought in two new ones to fill in the kennel, courtesy of Crystal Bradford and Julie Allemand.
Grade: A
Yes, the Seattle Storm successfully brought back their core for one more year for Sue Bird's victory tour, including Stewie's eponymous pup and Jewell Loyd's golden (mamba) retriever, Mikey. But they were also able to bring on one of the league's few cats, Halle Berry. Halle has been in France over the last year, plotting her revenge on the league after the Sky did Gabby Williams dirty.
Grade: A-
New York brought in exactly what they were missing with championship Center Stefanie Dolson and her talented pup Theo. These two truly bring unparalleled versatility to the role.
Grade: A-
The Connecticut Sun were near-perfect last year, dominating the regular season, and were expected to similarly trounce in the playoffs, until the Sky revealed their Achilles heel in lack of frontcourt offense. So the Sun have reloaded with Courtney Williams and her dog Dime, and Athletes Unlimited breakout star, Mamba Maximus Cole, pup of Taj Cole. They also locked in the talents of MVP Jonquel Jones' Goldendoodles Rylo and Kiba.
Grade: B+
From a dog perspective, the Mercury nailed it, bringing in world champion Snoop (Diamond DeShields' famous pup), without losing any petsonnel. They also brought in MVP Tina Charles at a criminally low salary, so fans have a lot to celebrate. I still have concerns, however, about the lack of dogs generally on the Mercury, and whether they form a cohesive pack.
Grade: B+
While not strictly free agency news, Wrigley Delle Donne reports that his owner is feeling fully healthy, for the first time in multiple seasons. Wrigley will be joined by another returner, Pancake Gustafsen.
Grade: B
The Wings have decided their fate will rise and fall with the talents of Arike Ogunbowale and her two dogs, locking them in with a three-year supermax deal. Certainly, these pups are stunners, but it remains a question whether they will allow the Wings to run with the big dogs of the other stacked teams in the league.
Grade: B
The Aces did what needed to be done and brought back MVP and star A'ja Wilson, as well as her pups Ace, Deuce, and newbie Zaen. But can they continue to flourish without potential dogsitters Angel McCoughtry and Liz Cambage?
Grade: :) :) :)
I don't want to be rude to the Fever, so I'm just going to focus on my excitement to see King and Jazmine Jones continue to bring their energy to the league.
Grade: 😇
Noted cat enthusiasts unsurprisingly did not move any dogs in or out this offseason. But bringing in Angel McCoughtry and retaining Layshia Clarendon brings me big joy.
Grade: F
They brought Hollywood to Hollywood and a DJ to the best city for her. But they took their eyes off the true prize: the aforementioned Halle Berry. Grade is also based on the Sparks' insistence on retaining my nemesis, Derek Fisher.
Grade: ?
What's the plan here, friends? Where are the dogs? Who is even on your team?
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